5864 miles
by Cath1
Summary: Ziva’s flying home. Or not home. Set after season five finale.


Title: 5864 miles

Disclaimer: Characters are not mine. I don't think.

Summary: Ziva's flying home. Or not home. Set after Series Finale.

Notes: Okay, so with any luck, the whole situation will be resolved within two episodes at most and not deteriorate into some House-type craziness. Really. As someone on TWoP pointed out, it may be all fingers in ears, "I can't hear you" type thinking – but it really will work in this instance.

Title refers to the distance between Washington DC and Tel Aviv. Allegedly. Sometimes the internet isn't always truthful…

XxX

She shifts uncomfortably in the airplane seat. The legroom – why couldn't someone have arranged a first class seat? – is laughable; her knees press against the seat in front of her, where an inconsiderate traveller has decided to recline his seat as far back as possible. The baby sitting somewhere in front has started crying again. Its screams seem to be at exactly the right pitch to invade her every sense and cause a headache.

She has travelled the world and back and no flight has ever been as excruciating as this.

If she'd admit it to herself, it's not the flight that is excruciating, it's the circumstances. This flight from Washington, DC to Tel Aviv will be the longest ten and a half hours she has ever experienced.

Already, she misses them. It's almost amusing in its irony: Ziva David, aching somewhere deep inside with the knowledge that she will never see her co-workers again. She gives a short laugh at this thought. It causes the man on her left to look at her briefly, but her glare discourages any lingering concerns about her mental wellbeing.

But she cannot get past the concept that the people at NCIS have been her life for several years now, and she misses them as much as if they were… family?

She remembers the first time she met them all. She cannot shake the thoughts that crowd her head.

McGee accepted her from the beginning, much as he would anyone. She could tell that he was a little reticent at her presence, but he was always polite, willing to answer her questions. She thinks of his immense knowledge all subjects. His books. She will have to keep a track on them; see what has happened in the lives of McGregor and Amy Sutton and Agent Tommy and LJ Tibbs. And Officer Lisa. Will there even be any more books?

Abby. Her friend Abby. A less than lukewarm greeting. Eyes narrowed in her direction as Gibbs discussed Ari's choice in ammunition. Yes, Ziva had felt Abby's fierce dislike from the beginning. And then over time, something changed. Hugs. She remembers Abby's hugs. She smiles a little in recollection. She should have been more enthusiastic about returning the hugs, she thinks. And the music. Okay, possibly not the music.

Ducky with his gentlemanly ways. Ducky and his stories; his tales of Edinburgh, of his youth. Even from the beginning, Ducky had included her. She almost laments the stories she will never learn.

Gibbs – she couldn't quite read him at first. She'd known his past, that was a given considering her background research. But understanding the man – that had taken some time. He was wary of her at first; she doesn't blame him for that – he was angry and she was naively protective of Ari. But then, he trusted her. And she knows that Gibbs's trust is worth a lot. To not have Gibbs as her boss, her mentor; it seems wrong. She will find it difficult to adjust to anyone else.

Tony. Tony. She found him attractive from the start, sure, but he was more of a distraction. Someone she could flirt with harmlessly, excessively, knowing that it would never become anything more. And somewhere along the way, things changed. They both knew it and despite its apparent inevitability, nothing will happen now. It saddens her more than she is willing to admit. He had some sort of magnetic pull on her that she was powerless against despite her alleged strength. She will miss him greatly. Maybe even his movie references.

And Jenny.

She closes her eyes in remembrance of her friend.

How things would have been different if they had never met.

Jenny was a good friend. A good woman. Misguided at times, perhaps, but always trying to do the right thing.

She will miss her friend.

She pours the small bottle of vodka into a plastic cup and then proceeds to down it. A ritual shared back in Europe. A brief salute to her friend.

She looks at her watch. She is maybe two hours from Tel Aviv. Two hours from her family. From her home. Home. The word generates thoughts of her apartment in Washington.

Strange how she never anticipated this.

She remembers the flight from Tel Aviv to Washington. That day when she travelled far away from her old life to this new career at NCIS. Jenny had approved it and she was eager to start work with her new team. With Gibbs, McGee, Tony, even Abby.

She was anxious to leave her old life behind.

And then, when she arrived and thought that Gibbs was telling her to leave… She was upset. The only time she had ever really felt rejected and one of the first times she'd failed at thoroughly hiding her feelings.

She's changed a little since then. Perhaps a lot.

She has cried, hugged, laughed, loved, mourned with these people.

So much has happened since she arrived in the US. And yet, so much has changed for the worse in such a short time. Vance is director now. Things would no longer be the same if she had been given the opportunity to remain. There would be no more McGee. There would be no more Tony. And what is the team without its constituent parts?

She opens her book and tries to concentrate on it instead of the dizzying thoughts inside her head.

She is going home. She tries to convince herself of this. Home.

And yet, home seems to be 5864 miles away from her destination.

XxX


End file.
